Tonight, we will stay in a waterfront hotel and talk about Iraq if we can stay awake. Shooting people takes it out of you.

SOMEWHERE ON THE NEW ENGLAND COAST

Lying to the Feds is a tightrope I decided not to walk on today.   If you get caught in a lie, they can make your life a living hell. The coordinated actions of various agencies and the Department of Justice should make anyone think about the consequences. 

I spoke with Sophie yesterday and told her, 

"Taking a family computer to someone who can help you crack a password is not a crime. I'm sure you needed to get all your father's financial records, and Chief Strier mentioned I may be able to help you with that."

When I said that, I coughed a bit and said, "Something was in my eye; I keep winking." 

Sophie laughed, saying, "I give a guy a computer to crack, and I still don't have the results." 

"Allston, you're on the clock, and I'm paying for it."

With that delivery, she coughed and said, "Somethings in my eye, I can't stop winking."

The girl learns quickly.  

The Feds will figure out that the Tanners were killed and that I am associated with the property from Tanner's house that coincidently brought in a few foreign actors that tried to kill me. They are going to drill down hard on Welch, Tanner, and Lemerise.

I'm going to drill quicker than them.

Today, while Eve and I were questioned, we repeated over and over that we had no idea why these three would try to kill us. I mentioned that occasionally, someone gets angry from a past investigation and that I am always looking over my shoulder.

The questions started in my yard, then I walked them through the very messy crime scene as I explained how Zippity Doo Dah came through this door with a gun aimed at me, and then Colonel D-Bag came through the other door and fired two shots at me.

I'm sure I'll be cleared for the shoot. It was self-defense inside my palace of pot roast and blueberry muffins.

When Tango ran toward a tree in the neighbor's yard and started barking at a man up the tree, Eve followed.

What she saw was a man aiming a rifle at our house, so she shot him in the leg.

Tennessee women are genetically predisposed to shoot first and sort it out later.  

"He was aiming at Allston through the window," she said

They wanted to know about my current caseload and whether anything was tied in with Islamic countries.

"Nope."

"Did you ever get to the contents of Sophie Tanner's computer?"

This question is my tax dollars delivering. They are starting to put two and two together.

"Nope."

Technically, this is not a lie.  My friend Ben Mason figured out the password "SophieGoalie37."  

The only thing I did was drop all the contents into a thumb drive. I have not seen the contents yet. The computer was on for the last 24 hours; I did not say that to anyone. That's client confidential.

Eve and I were questioned relentlessly. in separate rooms at the local station or together.  It was a royal tag team match that kept going with the same questions.

While there, we met many nice people working hard to get a local, state, or federal pension or any combination of the three. 

They kept asking about an Iraqi or Afghani angle, and I told them I had been to both countries. 

My ears perked up like Tango's, and I even tilted my head like his when Eve said, "I have been to Iraq" to the FBI.

While I was scratching my balls or my head trying to figure this out, a nice woman from the FBI asked Eve to "Please follow me." 

Eve shot me a glance and winked, but she did not cough.